Its ingrained in the brain..... - Atleast 25-30 times so far, when meeting new people, I've corrected them that my Atyu is a gal! She doesn't wear a bow headband and a pouffy dress, coz its just plain uncomfortable. She doesn't wear a pink explosion, coz both Mr.V & I aren't fans of pink and its us who buy stuff for her!
People aren't being insensitive or judging or anything. Its all innocent mistake, each and every one of them! My point is - I'm not offended by any of them. I'm just offended by the notion that's so well ingrained in our brains that pink pouffy is gal, blue comfy is boy! If you know basic biology, you'd know that unless a child is n*ked, there is absolutely no difference between the 2, atleast until pre-teens. So they look like what you wear on them! If a small boy wore a pink pouffy dress and grew hair, he'd look like a girl or......... that's the very point that's very offensive for me!
May be in future she'll become a Disney animator and actually draw princesses in pink pouffy gowns (as well as comfy outfits like Moana), or a model who showcases pink pouffy gowns, (or a soldier holding guns or a farmer with soil in hands or anything that she wants to become), but as such a tiny kid, what's the need to stereotype!!! Its my Atyudarini in both these pics - with a doll in a pink dress and with the soil & grass in blue pants. Its still her as inquisitive with the doll as much as she is on the soil, no matter what she wears!
Watch the video to know how unknowingly, innocently we tend to stereotype! Even before Atyu was born, I was deliberately trying to be non-stereotype. I was trying to buy gifts for my friend's daughter and son and at ToysRUs, I was just confused what to buy that's not Princess or Cars! Then I spotted Minions (though I haven't watched the movie)... And then I spotted a dad with a boy and girl shopping there. I went to them and asked if both boys & girls liked Minions and he asked his kids and they both said yes! I got 2 of each item, all Minion, for both the daughter and son of my friend.
Btw, have you read the comics of LunarBaboon? He's a father of a fabulous girl too. Here are some of his comics about his daughter. I realized how horrendous and grave the situation is when something happened a few years back - Mr.V offered Kinderjoy to a friend's daughter. She flung it on the ground coz it was Kinderjoy Boys!!! Ignorant Mr.V did not know Kinderjoy came in Boys & Girls versions that time!!! Apparently Kinderjoy 'knows' that boys can't handle princesses or flowers and girls can't handle cars or fighter jets!!!!!!
Gender Stereotypes are defined between the age of 5 & 7. Next time, ask the parent/guardian if the child is boy or girl, don't decide looking at the outfit. But don't ask this question before deciding on what gift to buy - buy anything - girls can handle cars or fighter jets and boys should know to handle a princess....
I think the situation is a bit complicated when it comes to stereotyping. One one hand our societies are unfortunately too rigid and strict when it comes to gender, on other side boys and girls are biologically different.
I learned about this in school, or we analyzed it actually. I think that the biggest issue is people micromanaging other people's children. We criticize others for not having the same opinion as ours. It all comes down to focusing on what you can control, what your child wants, and what makes them happy.
I can relate to your thoughts bhusha. My little girl always wants the blue boy kinder joy :-p She doesn't know what a boy or a girl is! But finds the blue toys interesting. And she likes pink color very much otherwise. Our tastes and choices differs with various factors. Stereotyping makes marketing, branding and sales easier. Guess, that's why we are unconsciously being fed with such unwanted information.
Excellent post. I dress my daughter in comfy tops and pants since thats perfect for play. And she is mistaken for a boy. I just ignore it. BTW, visiting your blog after a long time. Congratulations on the baby girl :)
I am reminded of the scene from Friends when Rachel puts a pink bow on Emma :) As a child I remember playing with trucks and buses long before a teddy bear or a barbie (both which I wanted my parents to buy for me when I was 8). And I wanted guns as well which my parents refused. The point it, parents have the ability to maintain some sort of equality for their children within their homes and immediate surroundings. That I feel will make the child grow up stronger
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I think the situation is a bit complicated when it comes to stereotyping. One one hand our societies are unfortunately too rigid and strict when it comes to gender, on other side boys and girls are biologically different.
ReplyDeleteI learned about this in school, or we analyzed it actually. I think that the biggest issue is people micromanaging other people's children. We criticize others for not having the same opinion as ours. It all comes down to focusing on what you can control, what your child wants, and what makes them happy.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to your thoughts bhusha.
ReplyDeleteMy little girl always wants the blue boy kinder joy :-p She doesn't know what a boy or a girl is! But finds the blue toys interesting. And she likes pink color very much otherwise. Our tastes and choices differs with various factors. Stereotyping makes marketing, branding and sales easier. Guess, that's why we are unconsciously being fed with such unwanted information.
I wonder when this preconceived notion will change from peoples mind.
ReplyDeleteinteresting baby concept
ReplyDeleteExcellent post. I dress my daughter in comfy tops and pants since thats perfect for play. And she is mistaken for a boy. I just ignore it.
ReplyDeleteBTW, visiting your blog after a long time. Congratulations on the baby girl :)
http://everythingthatclicks.blogspot.com
I am reminded of the scene from Friends when Rachel puts a pink bow on Emma :) As a child I remember playing with trucks and buses long before a teddy bear or a barbie (both which I wanted my parents to buy for me when I was 8). And I wanted guns as well which my parents refused. The point it, parents have the ability to maintain some sort of equality for their children within their homes and immediate surroundings. That I feel will make the child grow up stronger
ReplyDeleteBy commenting you accept to our GDPR Policy.
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